Due to my depression and anxieties I usually don't want to leave my house. I don't want to interact with people. I don't want to leave my safe, comfortable cave. It's nice here and it has my dog and my bed and my food and nobody can hurt me in here. I don't have to put on my "I'm fine" face when I am withing my walls. I've been trying to get outside more since I have my new camera. I've been outside taking pictures of Gucci and the field behind the house and even the landlady's dog. My goal is to go a little farther from my house and take pictures too. I was really struggling with my inner lazy voice Monday morning. I wanted to walk to the Dollar General to get some stuff that we needed. My lazy voice said to just stay at home and relax, that it was cold and misty outside. My anxiety voice told me that it was so far and that I would be so sore if I walked and then there would be people there and it just wouldn't be worth the walk.
Well I overcame my inner voices and I was rewarded. It was nice and cool outside so I knew I wouldn't get overheated which was a good thing. I took my camera with me intending to take a few pics along the way but I really wasn't inspired by anything. Until I got almost to the store. I couldn't believe my eyes. Sitting over on the fence about 15 yard away was this beautiful bird of prey. I couldn't get my camera out fast enough. I was just so excited! It checked me out as it posed for me. I'm not sure as to exactly what kind of bird it is but it is gorgeous. These pics are with no filters or edits. Just zoom. This feathered beauty is certainly an outstanding example of one of God's glories. I definitely plan on getting out on walks more often.
If any of ya'll happen to know exactly what kind of bird this is, please leave me a comment down below.
This is another topic I was given by my therapist and one I've been wrapping my head around all weekend. It's a topic of "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" or "why is an elephant seal so ugly to some, but a glorious creature to others." As I've been scouring the web for resources, I've experienced quite a variety of emotions. Two emotions have stood out in particular, anger, and that cutesy thing we girls do when we smile and go aaawww how cute.
When it comes to animals, it's really easy to say "ugly" is cute. My chihuahua, Gucci, has some permanent birth defects. His tail is crooked from broken spots in his tail. His forehead is lopsided from having a permanent open fissure and hydrocephalus. He walks funny from his little legs being a tiny bit messed up. Anyone who looks for chihuahua perfection may call Gucci ugly. To me, he is my handsome little man and he is the most adorable little thing ever.
I looked up the elephant walrus along with many other "ugly" animals. I found many animals that I certainly wouldn't classify in my own personal opinion as beautiful, but I did see a beauty in them all. Especially when I saw pictures of them with their young. It was quite humbling really to see how majestic creatures are when you look past their exteriors and see them interacting in their natural environments. And for your viewing pleasure, here is a gorgeous male elephant seal with a huge smile:
Now, it was very easy to stay pretty cheery while I looked up animals. There were many cute baby anilmals and such as that. But then, I got to thinking about people. So many people are so concerned about what others think about them. That makes me angry. So many people compare themselves and others to "society's standards." Judgement upon how others look is everywhere, especially on social media. Well it appears that "standards" are no longer the norm. Different is the norm. Different is beautiful. Being yourself is beautiful. Each and every one of us is beautiful. I am overweight. I have thinning hair. I have double chins. My butt is way bigger than I wish it was, but you know what, I am beautiful. My boyfriend says I'm beautiful. My kids say I'm beautiful. I may not be beautiful to someone else, but that someone else probably has their own beautiful person. It doesn't matter if you are beautiful or perfect to everyone. Don't worry so much about other people's opinions. It doesn't matter if you are accepted by everyone. It doesn't matter if everyone you meet on the street doesn't look at you and check you out. What matters is that you know that you are beautiful, because of and regardless of everything you see in the mirror. You are beautiful because of what lies within you. You are someone's beautiful. You will be someone's beautiful. Don't judge someone if they are not beautiful to you. That person that you just walked past and deemed as "ugly," is beautiful. Maybe not to you, but to someone. We have to see the beauty inside ourselves and then learn to not judge others. I know i'm horribly guilty of casting judgment. I must work on this. I also must work on seeing my inner beauty.
One of my goals for 2017 is to take better care of myself inside and out. I feel that this will make me feel more beautiful to myself. This blog has really opened up my eyes to the way I look at others. And it also makes me realize that I shouldn't worry about what others think about me. My opinion is the one that counts. I think I am going to put on my most beautiful smile, since smile are very healthy, and go cuddle with my very handsome Gucci. Please feel free to leave a comment if this blog has helped you at all.
